Writing is by and large a solitary activity. It isn’t something generally done in a group save for perhaps writing jams and community workshops. However, when writing your novel, short story, poetry, or any other project, you’re probably going to spend the lion’s share of your time by yourself, with only your ideas and thoughts to keep you company on the journey.
However, writing is not an isolated activity, as I have discovered. While writing a novel draft may be done in private, what comes afterward needs other people: submitting drafts to beta readers, finding editors to review your work, maybe even sharing passages with a local writers’ group. Why? Well, partly because we all need a few extra pairs of eyes to see the good and bad in our work that we can’t see ourselves. But we also need a smidgeon of encouragement from time to time.
I don’t say this out of selfishness or self-pity. All writers must build confidence in their work if they intend to publish. But let’s face facts. We all feel discouraged at some point or another. Perhaps we’ve hit writer’s block or we look back on our recent work and want to gag. Or maybe, even though everything is going swimmingly and we’re hitting all our deadlines, we still can’t shake off the inexplicable doldrums we’re feeling. And we need someone to talk to, someone we can trust and confide in.
As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, writers are not cut off from the world. We need other people, and we need encouragement. Being left alone with only our own thoughts to keep us company – well, I don’t know about you, but as a writer I tend to be a very harsh critic of my own work, always asking if it’s really any good.
Writing can become a lonely journey. Find someone, or a couple someones, willing to stick with you through it all, give honest feedback, be supportive, and most of all, be a friend. Writers shouldn’t live in a vacuum. It’s not healthy (or even really possible), and after all, half the fun of writing is to see people’s reactions to the things we create.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Asking whether I need time isn’t a question I can easily answer. Do I want time? Yes, I want time. To stop it in its tracks for as long as I desire and do all the things I want to do in life … that would be wonderful. But I can’t. Because we all only have a set amount of time, and we can’t get any more, regardless of whether we need it.
Maybe what can be said, then, is that we have enough time if we don’t spend it on frivolous, short-term trifles that don’t make a difference in the grand scheme of things. We are given the time we have. It’s clocked in at birth and clocks out at death. I don’t need time, but rather, maybe I should think harder on how to use the bundle of time I still have.
So, I guess what I’m saying is, no, I don’t need time. I need wisdom to use time rightly. Not an easy thing to live up to.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Probably not screaming when you don’t get dessert and walking into the house with mud covering your shoes.
“Kid at heart” is one of those curious expressions we use and don’t give much thought to. There’s a general consensus that everyone knows what it means, but do we really know what it actually means? Kids are selfish, loud, noisy, sometimes smelly, and generally very expensive. They are also seen as innocent, full of potential, and the future of civilization. Which may or may not be true (especially that part about innocence).
So, what does it mean to be a “kid at heart?” Perhaps it simply means to not let go of youthful vigor and enthusiasm. To not be jaded, as kids so rarely are, and to see the world as something fresh and new every day, as kids so often do. Kids are as flawed as adults, so I don’t think we should see childhood as a perfect little utopia long lost, but rather as a time when we were willing to have a little more joy in our lives and a little more willingness to learn.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Persist. Persistence is needed in life. Get out of bed, go to work, clean the house. Balance your checkbook, cook dinner, take your kids to sports practice. Every day, there is the routine. Keep at it. Always keep at it, even when you’re screaming inside.
Because you know what? Today you feel rotten, tomorrow you feel amazing. Today is hard. Working is hard, writing is hard and even picking up your socks is too much. Tomorrow, the misery clears away and you can take on the world. Persist.
Sometimes, you need to be stubborn. Your job sucks, you want to go home. Endure it. Stubbornly do the work expected of you. It won’t last forever, you know.
Persistence is refusal. Refusal to give up hope, refusal to give in to discouragement. Persistence doesn’t care about feelings or being in the zone. Persistence does, whether it wants to or not. Whether you want to or not.
So persist. Persist in achieving your goals, persist in improving your life, persist in getting through another day.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Whenever you are fed up with life, start writing: ink is the great cure for all human ills, as I have found out long ago.
C. S. Lewis
One of my favorite writers and thinkers, providing some advice to all writers out there – and anyone else who needs to work through life’s bullying moments.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
When I was a kid, the thing I wanted to be when I grew up was an “everyologist.” I wanted to do everything: science, literature, travel, architecture, painting, history. A five-year-old can easily imagine doing all those things. After all, he has all the time in the world. When a single year is one-fifth your total lifespan, the future stretches out to infinity.
Of course, our lives aren’t infinite, and as we grow up we learn that we don’t have all the time we want. I’m not an “everyologist,” though I do maintain a variety of interests and love to learn new things. I focus on my writing, my job, being with friends, reading, and living quietly. The more I learn I can’t do everything, the more I learn to focus on what I actually find worth doing.
I’d probably be a lousy architect, for one. And I’ve toyed with the visual arts, but it doesn’t hold my attention like writing does. And hey, I can always cheat: the Internet has lots of ways to learn and explore without actually, well, doing anything. It’s something, right?
But the Internet itself takes up our time (yes, I am aware of the irony of that statement on a blog). Too much? Well, that’s up to you. What else do you hope to do today?
All that being said, something else I’ve learned in life is that I have a lot more time than I sometimes suspect. It’s the things I feel I have to do – little things, like finish this book by such-and-such a date, or catch up on that TV series everyone is talking about – that eat away at our “free” time. It’s not really free if we treat our hobbies as a strange set of obligations. A career is one thing, but entertainment quite another. Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that viewing our lives from new angles reveals that we don’t need much to fill up our time in a satisfying way.
I’m not a master of everything, and I’m okay with that. I have time enough for what I enjoy.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Apple seeds are small and insignificant. They’re tiny specks of black that you carve out of an apple and throw away. They’re detritus tossed on the ground. But give it rich soil to take root in …
The apple tree comes from the small and insignificant seed. It is tall and strong. It’s branches are broad and its leaves green. It bears good fruit. Just give it time. Be patient. Nurture it. Graft in healthy branches. Care for it and watch it produce an abundance. Time invested is time rewarded.
So it is with dreams. Nurture your dreams, give them care, treat them patiently. They won’t emerge fully formed in a day. Months and years and decades. These are the lifespans of realized dreams. Work. Wait. Watch. They will grow. They will bear fruit.
Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Funny thing, emotions. In the grips of an emotional high, we feel invincibility and never-ending optimism. Any choice we make is a good one and can only yield good things. And then, with a snap of the fingers and a blink of the eye, we plummet into the doldrums. Everything is wrong, and what can we possibly do to make it better?
The truth is, our emotions are in constant flux. We all have off days where we just feel miserable for no good reason. And we have pleasant days when we feel like everything will keep going swell forever.
We talk about our off days, but what about when just an hour feels off? Have you have ever had a really terrific minute? Sounds silly, doesn’t it? But passions can snap back and forth that quickly. Happy warps into angry after an unexpected phone call, then changes back to happy forty minutes later after a tasty dinner. We wake up feeling listless, but after an invigorating workout, we perk up. In point of fact, all of us can jump from sad to happy to sad again to upset to tranquil all in one afternoon … and for no apparent reason at all.
In short, emotions are really weird. Do you want to feel differently from how you’re feeling now? Wait twenty minutes.
Now, when I talk about emotions, I’m not talking about medical depression. That’s an entirely different conversation. A diagnosed case of depression is a far cry from just feeling “bleh” or lacking joy in our lives. But in most everyday situations, irritation and sorrow walk hand-in-hand with joy and happiness, and they all get mixed together into a crazed tapestry that forms our emotional spectrum. They all take turns. Just because we feel a certain way about something at any given time, doesn’t meant that our opinion won’t make a one-eighty at any given moment.
There’s a somewhat unpleasant implication to take away from this: We can’t trust our feelings when making important choices. We can’t ignore them either, but something so changeable doesn’t strike me as a solid foundation on which to build decisions and opinions. I certainly can’t. I’m a moody guy, and I’ve simply learned that if I’m feeling rotten, I need to be patient and wait for it to run its course. Or heck, I’m hungry and just need a snack.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about medical depression. That’s an entirely different conversation. A diagnosed case of depression is something different from everyday emotional turbulence. Our normal emotions are something perfectly natural. To feel is to walk down a road alternatively smooth and bumpy.
When you’re feeling good, you know you can take on the world. So, you make that impulse buy. You dive into building that house. You decide, perhaps, to start writing a book. And you start out strong! Everything is going exactly as planned. Alas, you eventually run into a problem. And the good feeling fades. What’s left? Well, you still made your choice. Do you abandon it until you feel nice again, or do you resolve to keep trucking along regardless?
As a writer, there are days when I’m 100% satisfied with my work, and there are days when I know my book is crap, my writing skill is garbage, and maybe I should just find a new hobby. But, I write anyway. Emotions come and go, but they shouldn’t take our goals and dreams with them. Life is hard. How much harder would it be if employees only went to work when they were happy? Or parents only paid attention to their kids when they were in a good mood? Or doctors only decided to treat their patients when they were riding that emotional high?
People change. Change is the only constant (besides taxes), so maybe we should bear in mind that our current state of mind can flex and bend and not be hasty to make big decisions based on our emotional response. After all, eventually you will calm down, and then your brain will take over and help you make a more rational choice. Or even better, you’ll learned how to disassociate from your emotions and think logically even in the midst of turbulence. It is possible. Hard, but possible.
Emotions are a good thing. They help us get through hard times, and they teach us empathy and compassion. But they aren’t the sole guiding light in our lives. And they shouldn’t be the only director of our choices. After all, who wants a compass that doesn’t always point north?
If you just so happen to be enjoying my blog, feel free to subscribe. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
My first book, A God Walks up to the Bar, is available on Amazon.com. Witness the modern day adventures of the Greek god Hermes in a world much like our own – and with demigods, vampires, nymphs, ogres, and magic. The myths never went away, they just learned to move on with the times. It’s a tough job, being a god!
As we get older, we start having deep thoughts. Questions run through our minds, questions like, “What will I leave behind when I’m gone?” and “How will people remember me?” With age comes an acute awareness that our time on Earth is finite, and with that come musings on what our legacy will be. What mark will our lives leave on the world? Will we, to get to the heart of things, have done anything that mattered?
Legacy is a loaded word. It’s a word associated with empires and rulers. It invokes monuments that endure for centuries. Legacies are connected to greatness. The greatest men and women of history, whether good or bad, are remembered by all.
And look at what society says to us. We must work hard to leave our own mark. We must strive to improve the world, to improve society, to make positive changes, to “be the change you want to see.” Or even, just to leave the world a little better than when we found it. A burden, one might say. It is something imposed on people from a young age to aspire to greatness.
I say it’s a distraction from what’s truly important. Today’s great accomplishments are tomorrow’s misguided attempts. We simply don’t know how we will be remembered, or by whom, or for what. That guy you accidentally cut off on the freeway is going to remember you very differently than your favorite uncle who loves the sweater you bought him for Christmas. And that piece of litter you picked up in the park without a second thought might inspire some passing child to pursue a career in conservation. The door you held open for an old lady might have given her new hope in life.
Farfetched, you say? What do we truly know about what will affect others the most? Media tells us that big causes and organizations are what change the world. But not everyone is going to make a mark on that scale. What does that tell us? That those who don’t measure up to vaguely defined goals are failures?
Right, right, this is all very deep and philosophical, but maybe you’re wondering what this means for you. Or you’re wondering who this pretentious nit with a blog is, anyhow. Well, the long and short of it is: Your legacy is everything you do, big and small. And the small things, in my experience, tend to matter more than the big.
We’re not all going to be famous when we die. We’re not all going to found a world-spanning charity or find the cure to a terrible disease or invent a new technology. But we are all capable of acts of kindness. Compassion and sympathy go a long, long way. There might not be any prizes or awards, and nobody’s going to erect a monument for a gentle word, so maybe it doesn’t appeal to everyone. At least, until you need a kind word yourself on a bad day.
We can’t control our own legacies. We can maybe dictate what’s written on our tombstone, and will our possessions to others, but how we truly affected the world – for better or ill – is a far more complex thing that can’t be summed up in a few brief achievements.
Legacies shift and change and what we consider our magnum opus might be forgotten within a few years. So, if you ever find yourself getting worried over how people remember you, just relax. Just do your best and be kind. I suspect we’d all be surprised if we were aware of the things we did that truly mattered most to others.
If you just so happen to be enjoying my blog, feel free to subscribe. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.
Escapist entertainment. What thoughts run through your head when you hear that phrase? Positive? Negative? Joy? Disapproval?
Escapism gets a bit of a bad rap. Life is serious business, and there’s a lot of work to be done. People are suffering. Injustice is rampant. And when are you going to pay those bills? Why are you wasting time on fluff?
But is escapism a bad thing?
Imagine yourself going up against the hard knocks of life every day. Life is a jerk. It hits you hard without letting up. And it doesn’t play fair. It pulls your hair, throws sucker punches, and it cheats you out of a rightful win.
Even when life lets up, work and responsibilities can weigh heavily. Imagine a rock on the coast, battered by the waves every hour of every day of every year. The rock stands tall for a time, but every wave takes a little bit of it into the sea. The stone is smoothed and weathered. Eventually, it wears away completely. That is a person who works and works and works, but never takes time for a moment’s respite. Life just … wears you down to nothing.
We need to escape, sometimes.
Some light reading, a silly movie, an action-filled comic book, a walk in the park, a thrilling sports activity. For someone somewhere in the world, they’re all ways to distance oneself from the daily grind and relax. They are ways to refresh the mind and body and forget about our troubles for a few precious moments. We need escapism for the sake of our sanity.
Escapist fiction allows us to suspend disbelief and accept that there can be stories that don’t have to reflect reality. Superman and James Bond and Indiana Jones aren’t high art, but they are fun. And what’s the point of entertainment that isn’t fun? There is art and literature that dwells on philosophical questions and searches for meaning in the tragedies of life, but here’s another nugget to chew on: Real life never goes away. It’s waiting for you right outside the door. There is plenty of time to dwell on the deep questions. But don’t we just want to – need to – take a break from it once in a while?
Ah, but here comes the counterpoint: Escapism is withdrawing from responsibility to society and ourselves. It’s evading the important things in life, the things that we must do to live healthily and productively. But all things in moderation. A life of nothing but escapist fantasy is as bad as a life of nothing but grim obligation to work.
Still, there’s a reason why people like fluff entertainment. There’s a reason why people want to laugh at silliness and cheer on the hero fighting the evil villain. Such stories are simple and inspiring. Why do you think cartoons and comics were thriving during the Great Depression? Or during the more recent Great Recession, for that matter? People need something good in their lives, and for many, that can only be found in stories. And it is a healthy thing, because people need hope. We all need a counterbalance against the mundane and dreary.
The greatest responsibility, then, of the escapist is to remember that there is a time and place for everything. A time to mourn, and a time to laugh. A time to work, and a time to play. But don’t forget to take a moment’s respite. You might need it more than you think.
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Jake W. Powell 