Tag: writer

I Long to Destroy a Single Word

If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?

Censorship is something I generally take a dim view of, but if I was given the power to ban just one word, I would ban – well, let’s see, there are several words that irk me, but if I had to pick only one …

Literally. I would scour all media and erase the word “literally” from existence.

I acknowledge that language evolves. It changes. Meanings change. What a word meant last decade is completely unrelated to its usage today. But that doesn’t mean I have to like the evolution of a word that originally described a thing or action conforming to its own description as fact rather than metaphor, i. e., the expression “hit the road” taken literally by beating the pavement with a stick or someone who is “feeling blue” literally turning a shade of blue. The adverb once had a very specific meaning that applied in very specific circumstances, and using it outside of that purpose was incorrect.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

That was literally the best concert I’ve ever been to. Stephen Spielberg is literally the best director in history. I literally almost died in that car collision. I literally read ten books in a single month. This is literally not how you use the word.

It’s just another word to emphasize a point. Somewhere along the line, someone decided that “really” and “very” and “extremely” and “superlatively” and “quite possibly” and “definitely” were all too boring and decided to give the English language another disembowelment.

And that’s the evolution of language. Words take on entirely new meanings and the old ones are left behind. It’s natural. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

The worst part, in my opinion, is that it shrinks our daily vocabulary. “Literally” could be replaced by a slew of options in everyday conversation, but we fall back to the quick and easy method of using one over and over and over again. It’s a shame that we gradually decrease our ability to express ourselves by loading a single word with a hundred different meanings rather than learning a hundred different words with very particular, targeted meanings. It’s more work, true, but it makes speech so much more interesting.

But that’s enough of me preaching. Language is language and things will go the way that society drives them, regardless of whether or not it knows how to steer. If I had the power, I would immolate the word “literally,” sweep up the ashes, and dump them in the sea. Alas, that I cannot literally do such a thing to a word.

***

My latest book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.“

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

A Law for Learning Language

If you had the power to change one law, what would it be and why?

There’s a joke that I’m far too fond of reciting to friends and family. It goes like this:

“If you speak three languages, you’re trilingual. If you speak two languages, you’re bilingual. If you speak only one language, you’re American.”

Sad but true.

If I had the power to change one law in my country, it would be to make mandatory that every American elementary and high school student be taught at least one non-English language. It’s an important skill, especially in a world that is growing more interconnected with every passing year.

English may be the lingua franca of today’s society, and your average English-speaker may be able to travel to nearly any country expecting someone to cater to his limited lingual skills, but that won’t last forever, will it? And besides, just because someone can speak English doesn’t mean they’ll humor you. And they can say mean things about you that you can’t understand.

Alright, cynicism and paranoia aside, besides the practical uses of speaking multiple language is the joy of learning and fluency. It opens doors, it draws people together and, quite frankly, it makes life a little easier if you’re not hobbled by ignorance of what others are saying.

America is a very cosmopolitan place. Lots of ethnicities and cultures exist here. And learning to speak Spanish or Mandarin or Arabic or French when you’re a kid is a lot easier than when you’re an adult.

Someday, I imagine, English won’t be a language that other countries’ students are required to learn. There ought to be a law that thinks that far ahead, and that’s the law I’d like to make: Students must become fluent in another language.

***

My latest book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.“

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

Nostalgia Courtesy of a Snickers Bar

What is your favorite candy?

Food is such a nostalgic thing. Memories of my favorites conjure up childhood memories of family outings and fun with friends. I get warm fuzzies thinking of my mother’s old cooking, or a particularly memorable birthday party, or that one time I was allowed to have a pizza when my parents left me home alone one night. And, of course, the memory of favorite candies.

Mine are Snickers. Nuts and caramel covered in chocolate. Not airy fluff like 3 Musketeers and with more texture than a Kit Kat, Snickers bars are the perfect blend of dense, crunchy, tasty and buttery smooth.

I don’t eat them much anymore, but I remember when I was young that every time I went with my parents on our monthly shopping trip to the navy exchange I would get a Snickers from the candy kiosk before check out. I had to finish it before getting back in the car, or I’d get chocolate stains all over the seat.

Snickers isn’t just a favorite candy. It’s a catalyst for fond memories. I can recall nearly every part of that store: the maze of grocery aisles; the home and garden section with kitchen supplies and clothes and magazines and knick knacks; the garden greenhouse, which had a fun corner where they kept the action figures and other toys; the tiny food court where we occasionally grabbed McDonald’s (and where I confirmed that McDonald’s will never be as good as Burger King).

I haven’t thought about any of this in a long time. Food really is a key to nostalgia’s lock. Good days long gone, but readily remembered with a little gastronomic prompting. I miss them.

***

My latest book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.“

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

Writers, Mix It Up

I’ve started on the third installment in my urban fantasy series. Everyone writes at different speeds, and I’m somewhere in the middle of the pack, I think. I published my first book in August 2023 and published my second in January of this year. I hope to finish this third installment by the end of next year.

Maybe I am a slow writer, after all, but when you have a job and other commitments, you can’t be a writer 24/7, unfortunately.

Anyway, I’m happy with my work, but after finishing this current project, I think I’ll take a break from Hermes’ adventures. I’m in the mood to try something new. And that’s healthy, I’m finding. Writing about the same thing is kind of like exercising. If you keep exercising the same muscle group over and over, you end up hurting yourself rather than strengthening yourself.

So, I want to mix it up. I want to write different stories after finishing book #3 and stretch my talents. Broaden my horizons and various other cliches. It’ll be fun, and it’s good practice to try something new.

***

My book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.“

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

If I Won the Lottery

What would you do if you won the lottery?

I’m assuming we’re talking large numbers here. I won four bucks once. It’s still in my wallet.

In all seriousness, if I won a million dollars, I’d invest it. I know, not fancy or decadently extravagant, but what’s the point of having a Lamborghini now when retirement comes and you have no money for food or rent? I’d rather live comfortably in my golden years than stare at my extremely expensive purchases and realize I can’t eat them.

That being said, I doubt I would invest all of it. I think I would put half in savings and keep half for spending on accoutrements more important than fast cars and humongous yachts. Like, say, sturdy clothing, a good, reliable commuter car, maybe a new computer or TV if I felt like splurging. Basics first, then luxuries.

Funny thing about money, the more I imagine having, the more I realize I would want more. Right now, if I were given $20,000, then that would be a lot and I would be satisfied, but if I ever received $1,000,000, all I would think about is why couldn’t it have been $2,000,000? The bigger the number is, the bigger I want the number to be.

Maybe I’m better off not winning the lottery at all … Or just sticking with a million and leaving it at that.

***

My new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

The Ancient Age of Computers

Write about your first computer.

It was a big deal in my life owning a computer for the first time. Oh, I grew up using my parent’s, but having my own was almost a rite of passage into adulthood.

As many of you already know, I’m a writer, and I’ve been writing for most of my life. My first typed ramblings were done on a word processor, the grandaddy of modern computers where the only thing you could do was type and print. No fonts, no editing, no formatting. The missing link between the typewriter and the computer.

My first proper computer, though, was a birthday gift. It was a big deal, as you might imagine, especially since I was in, what? Fifth or sixth grade? A long time ago, in the days of yore when computers were big solid blocks, the mouse and keyboard were wired, the monitor was tiny, and it was the really big towers tucked away behind the desk that held all the processing power. These were the days of floppy discs that could hold maybe a single magazine issue’s worth of information before filling up and needing you to buy another one. No memory sticks here.

Before touch screens. Before iPhones. Before Bluetooth. Yes, the time when there was only – shudder – dial-up.

Some of you reading this remember dial-up. Using a landline phone connection to hook up to the Internet. When I wanted to go online, I had to tell my parents, because we couldn’t use the phone and be online at the same time. And then there was the sound. All I can really say is, if you know, you know. The sinister symphony of beeps, honks and screaming static. The sound of an age before instant convenience. Back in my day, we waited minutes to get online.

I liked that computer. Well, it was my only one, so I had better like it, but it was fun. Surfing the old version of the web, playing computer games that required actual discs (sometimes more than one for a single game!) and using the old Microsoft Word that came in an actual package rather than be an online service.

But that computer is gone now. It died, as computers tend to do. A moment of silence for the Ancient Age of Computers. But not for dial-up. Dial-up will not be missed.

***

My new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

How to Write the Best Novel Ever

Looking for how to be the greatest author who ever lived? Need some quick and easy advice on the quick and easy way to become rich and famous? Just follow these ten tips without question, and you will become an author that nobody will forget! Absolutely not satire!

  1. Plagiarize other writers. Sharing is caring. Besides, they did the really hard part, so why not be efficient? If they didn’t want people using their stuff, they wouldn’t have made it public, now, would they?
  2. Use the most complicated, flowery language you can. Pull words from the dictionary with at least four syllables. Use really big words never used in casual conversation and sprinkle them liberally throughout your story. That way, everybody knows how smart you are.
  3. Don’t use consistent characterization. People aren’t consistent in real life, so why should they be in fiction? Don’t worry if your protagonist acts contradictory to established personality and goals. Just have them do whatever with no real rhyme or reason. It’s not like readers actually care about that sort of thing.
  4. Write maybe once or twice a month. Why stress yourself out? Write whenever you feel like. After all, you can only write well if you’re “in the zone.” Writing every day regardless of how you feel is just plain silly and definitely bad for your skin.
  5. Editing is a waste of time. Reviewing your work for typos, story flow and all that other stuff is dumb. Why compromise your original vision by changing all your hard work? Even worse is submitting your novel to editing by other people. Didn’t your parents teach you to never trust strangers?
  6. Novels are only good if they have lots of symbolism. They taught us that in high school literature class, so it must be true. Symbolism is way more important than storytelling, so make sure everything in your novel is symbolic: the color of people’s clothes, their names, their hairstyle, and especially innocuous, minor details that are otherwise irrelevant to the story. Everything is symbolic and has Deep Meaning™.
  7. Constructive criticism is dumb and bad and should be ignored. If someone doesn’t like something in your book and suggests how to improve it, they’re just jealous and probably want to sabotage you. Surround yourself with people who compliment everything you do and listen to them exclusively. But remember, per tip #5, don’t let them actually touch your book.
  8. Bigger books are better, so write as many words as you can and don’t cut any out. Refer to tip #2. All the hard copy versions of the world’s greatest novels are big enough to be used as doorstoppers. So, obviously, you want to write a huge book with lots of words. NEVER use 3 words when you can use 30.
  9. Draw your own cover art. Why bother letting someone else draw your vision? Save time and money by drawing the art yourself! You know what you want, and it’s guaranteed to be memorable.
  10. Include a gimmick. Everybody writes the same old boring way, so make yourself stick out. Write only in present tense, or make each character’s lines a different color, or write the pages out of order, or write sentences backwards. People like that kind of fun and will definitely appreciate all the extra effort you put in.

Ultimately, it is up to you on whether to make the correct decision and follow this free advice. Remember, this is ABSOLUTELY not satire designed to point out things that can hinder a book’s quality or a humorous article designed to make people laugh. This is absolutely serious stuff and following these steps will make you the best writer in the history of the universe and rich enough to buy a whole nation. Everyone will love and adore you forever as you achieve authorial apotheosis.

I repeat, this is in no way satire, and taking this advice seriously will not lead to you angrily arguing with people over your book’s reviews on Amazon.

And no, I am not crossing my fingers behind my back. My hand is itchy.

***

My new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

Dreams in Life

We all have dreams. We have desires and goals we want to achieve. It might be something small or something grand, something that encompasses a single week or a whole lifetime. But we all have something we dream about.

How far do you go to achieve your dream? What are you willing to do? And what are you willing to sacrifice? Do you think about it all day long, but do nothing? Or do you work a little bit towards it every day?

How much do you dedicate to your dream? How much do you sacrifice? And when is the sacrifice too great? When does the dream become a tyrant that destroy your life rather than enrich it?

What place do dreams have in our lives? Do we seek them out at all costs? Or do we know when there are things even more important? Sometimes, we must not sacrifice for the dream, but sacrifice the dream itself. Life goes on. We go on.

But we never stop dreaming.

***

My new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

Selling Ideas

Come up with a crazy business idea

I’m working off of this daily prompt under the assumption that “crazy business idea” means something that no sane, rational person would actually attempt with a serious expectation of success. Something so absurd that only a crazy person would expect it to turn a profit. Something that –

Let’s face it, somebody would try to do this in real life, and scarily enough, it might just work.

My idea is to sell ideas as a service.

No, no, not selling an idea for a type of service, but selling actual ideas. For example, Joe Citizen wakes up one day and wonders, “What should I have for breakfast? I can’t decide.” So, he calls up Ideas, Inc. and asks. Ideas, Inc. tells him to make waffles. What a good idea!

Jane Doe wants to know where her son should go to school. Ideas, Inc. to the rescue! And what should he major in when he enters college? Ideas, Inc. can tell you!

Wondering what car to buy and in what color? A monthly subscription to Ideas, Inc. can give you these answers and more!

Why bother thinking when you can subscribe to a service that thinks for you?

Like I said, silly and nonsensical. But is it really? Hmm…

And if I ever see this service in real-life, I will know somebody stole the idea from me, heh.

***

My new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is currently available on Amazon in both Kindle and paperback format.

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

Many thanks for visiting my blog. I post updates on my writing career, I muse over storytelling and fiction, and I reflect on the curious and wonderful things in life.

My New Book is Out on Amazon!

I am very excited to announce that my new book, The Trickster’s Lament, is now available on Amazon for both Kindle and paperback. This is my second ever published book and a sequel to my first, A God Walks Up to the Bar. I hope that my readers enjoy the further modern day adventures of the Greek god Hermes.

Synopsis:

“Hermes is not having the best time. He walks a fine line, and his duty as messenger of Olympus weighs heavily on him. Being a god in the modern age means living in a world that no longer believes in gods. How much can one deity accomplish when no one respects him anymore? And why do his instincts tell him that he, the son of Zeus, is losing favor with his own family?

Tensions abound. The upstart Young Gods play dangerous games using entire cities as their boards. Formless monsters strike from the nighttime shadows, terrorizing hapless mortals. Agents of rival pantheons scheme to thwart Olympus’ designs. In the thick of it all, Hermes does what he does best: trick, lie, and cheat his way to victory.

He may be disrespected. He may be kicked about. He may even be falling out with his pantheon. But Hermes is a trickster. He knows how to play dirty in a world that doesn’t play fair. But though he can best man, beast, and god, he isn’t prepared for his wiliest opponent yet: his own conscience.”

And for those who missed it the first time …

A God Walks Up to the Bar, my first foray into publishing, is also on Amazon.com. Interested in Hermes’s first recorded adventures battling half giants, skinwalkers, vampires, and other foes? Check it out!

As always, thanks for simply visiting my blog and sharing in my writing career and my various musings on life, the universe, and everything. Whether you click that subscribe button or not, I truly appreciate your taking the time to read my ramblings. Cheers.