The Greatest Teacher: What’s the Role of Failure in Life?

Do you know the magic word that society loves to hear? The Pied Piper’s song, leading us along without us giving it serious thought.

SUCCESS.

It’s the ultimate carrot on a stick.

SUCCESS.

It’s a wonderful word, so supreme and comfy in its vagueness that we rarely worry that we don’t really know what we mean by it.

SUCCESS. It’s the defining feature of happy people. If you’re not successful, then you must be … a loser!

Kids learn from an early age: Success is good. Failure is bad. Don’t fail. You must succeed at everything you do.

I submit for your consideration an alternative perspective: Failure is good. Failure is necessary. In fact, we should allow ourselves to fail. Failure is a good thing. Well, sort of. Let me explain.

Failure is the greatest teacher, as a very wise person once said. Think back on your life. Do you remember a great triumph? Maybe you finished a project that you were really satisfied with? Or gave an excellent presentation at work, or made a great speech to an audience? How do we get to these triumphs? Well, a couple ways. There’s sheer dumb luck, of course, but Lady Luck is a little fickle and I don’t trust her. She smiles too much.

Then there’s hard work, practice, and trial and error.

Wait a minute … Trial and error? Does that mean … mistakes are a part of succeeding? Well, yes. We learn from our mistakes. When everything is business as usual – let’s be honest – do we really notice? When I’m writing my book draft and all the words come out smoothly, I’m happy. But then the time for the next draft comes around and HOLY SMOKES WHERE DID ALL THESE TYPOS COME FROM? How did I misspell that word? I know the difference between “their” and “there!” And how could I use so many cliches? Shameful.

But I don’t forget the mistakes I made.

When you flunk a test in school, you’ll probably never remember the answers you got right. But you certainly remember the ones you got wrong. Failure educates us. And if we’re smart, we’ll remember our lessons for the next time.

It’s healthy to fail. In fact, it’s inevitable that we will, at some point and in some way, experience setbacks. Might as well learn that lesson ASAP.

Success is nice. We should try to achieve our goals in life. But success is kind of dimwitted. Success can’t really tell you anything you don’t already know. Failure is much more interesting. Failure has plenty to say. It will gladly talk your ear off if you pay attention. Failure is always willing to point out our shortcomings. And I’m very thankful for that, because otherwise I’d go through the rest of my life blissfully ignorant of flaws that could be remedied if I just put myself in a situation where they become obvious. Awkward? Yes. Useful? Very.

We shouldn’t seek to fail. But we should be more open to it. We should allow ourselves to fail. Don’t reject it. Don’t shun it. Learn from it, dust yourself off, and move on.

Think about it. If you want to succeed at something, how many times are you willing to deal with failure before you achieve it?

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